Love is an open door

The sentiment of this song is actually really sweet and not too sappy, but it's still not what REAL love is all about. I will say in Disney's defense that it might be difficult to make "I love you even when you smell like baby vomit" melodically appealing though. After 15+ years of dating, 7 years of marriage, 2 cats, and 2 children here is what I think love is really all about.

Love is being there. You might not be showered or wearing "real clothes". You might be older or heavier than you were when you first met. You might be suffering from mental, physical, or emotional stress that has altered how you even see yourself. But when you really love someone you are still there. Day in and day out. By their side. Wrinkles, graying hair, ill-fitting pants and all.

Love is laughing together. In your younger days the laughter might have been over a comedy at the movies or while sharing stories of childhood adventures. Now it's often over who changes the most poopy diapers (me, hands down) or the latest ridiculous thing the four year old said ("Your private parts are nice, mommy" on walking in on me getting out of the shower this morning...). The point is, keep smiling, laughing, and finding joy in things together.

Love is growing together. We are all always changing. For most of us the changes are slow, subtle, and happen so indistinctly that we don't realize we've even changed until we look back at where we were and see how far we've come. Truly loving someone means making this journey with them rather than away from them.

Love is messy. It's not a fairy tale that starts at a ball and ends with happily ever after. It's ups and downs. Love can fill you with such happiness that you feel like you are literally about to burst. And sometimes love feels like the smallest flicker of light in the pit of your stomach on the brink of snuffing out completely. Even on those darkest days true love is there, part of you, just waiting for you to take a deep breath and feed the flame.

Love is accepting yourself as someone worth loving. You can have SO MUCH love for your partner, but if you don't value the role you play in the love relationship things will never be as good as they could be. This most crucial point is where I personally have struggled the most (and still struggle at times). Put simply, love yourself so others can too!

So there you have it, Disney. Love is getting old and frumpy, changing poopy diapers, fighting the darkness within, and a whole lot of self-reflection. Good luck turning that into a musical ballad...